White leaders condemn Kerri-Anne Kennerley over racism row

The australian have an article out at the moment headlined ‘Indigenous leaders back Kerri-Anne Kennerley in racism row’. The article interviews three members of the Liberal Party for their views on it, suffice it to say that they were all pretty cool with KAK’s comments.

Apparently the australian are the deciders on who gets to be an ‘Indigenous Leader’, so even though IndigenousX is a site that privileges Indigenous voices, we thought we’d take a different tack on this one.

We thought we’d ask some White leaders about their thoughts on the situation.

We made sure we only asked straight white men too, which as we all know, is the best kind of white.

After all, when it comes to what does or what doesn’t constitute racism in Australia, we all know that white voices are far more important than Indigenous ones.

We made sure we only asked straight white men too, which as we all know, is the best kind of white.

First off, we asked noted cartoonist, First Dog on the Moon, who we assume also has a people name but we forgot to ask.

When contacted, First Dog said “Happy to help, but please don’t do anything that’s gonna get me sued for defamation.”

We then asked, “Are you racist, FD?”

After an awkward pause, he replied “Am I racist? I try not to be. But it’s pretty difficult walking around on stolen land living it up on the profits of everything that was taken from Aboriginal people. White guilt can be extremely unpleasant when you remember you have it.”

“So then, that means you condemn KAK’s comments on Channel Ten the other day?” we asked.

“And yes, of course I condemn KAK’s comments on channel 10 but do you have to tell everyone? I don’t want to end up on the “Difficult people who don’t get hired” list with Yumi.”

First Dog also added, “Please don’t call me again though.”

So there you have it, one white leader who unequivocally condemns KAK.

We then asked prominent White leader J.R Hennessy.

We actually have no idea who he is or what he does, but he has a blue tick on Twitter, tweets some pretty funny stuff from time to time, and judging from his Twitter profile picture I think we can all agree that it doesn’t get much whiter than this.

A white leader in his natural habitat.

We asked J.R “What are your thoughts on what Kerri-Anne Kennerley said on that brekkie tv show she was on?”

J.R responded “Sorry, I rarely wake up before 2pm so I don’t actually watch morning tv. Who the f*ck is Kerri-Anne whomever and what did she say?”

“Some typical stupid racist shit.” we informed him.

“Sounds pretty racist then.” he replied.

“Also, how did you get this number?” he added.

BAM! That’s two white leaders in the bag who unequivocally oppose Kerri-Anne Kennerley’s comments.

Sounds pretty racist then.

To round it off, we also spoke to former Indigenous Affairs Editor for The australian, from 2016-2018, Stephen Fitzpatrick. So not only a white leader, but also a fully fledged white expert on Indigenous people.

When asked for his views on the KAK debacle, Stephen said, “Look, clearly what she said was racist by any definition of racism.”

(He actually said that too. Ask him.)

He then added, “You’re not actually going to call me a ‘white expert on Indigenous people’ though, are you? Please don’t do that.”

Three for three.

Case closed.

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